Ready For 34


It’s the eve of my birthday and that, for me, is always a time of reflection. Where am I now, where was I then… that sort of thing. It’s amazing to chronicle the turning of the years in this way. I can’t remember many of the birthday parties, heck I can’t even remember some of the birthday years, but I maintain a general idea of where I was when.

When I was 18 I thought I’d be a missionary. I spent my 21st birthday at Nectar’s bar in Burlington, soon after moving to the city. By 25 I was living the high life in Dallas and one month after my 30th birthday soiree I was in rehab. My 31st birthday I spent with my loving horde of nieces and nephewsand last year… well, I don’t really remember last year very well, but I’m sure it was fun.

I wonder what my 34th year will bring. I wonder if I will be more at peace, more settled? I wonder if I’ll stop changing all the time and enjoy a little consistency. I wonder if consistency is enjoyable. I wonder if I’ll make peace with my faith, maybe even figure out what it is. I wonder if I’ll still be a writer this time next year. I wonder if I’ll still be happy.

As the final hours of my 33rd year pass I look at my life and know that I am happy, that I am content. It is not where I thought I would be, it is not what I thought to be right, but it is my joy. I am sober. I am in love. I am moving in with the man I love. I am striving to find balance and very often succeeding. My world is racing toward wellness. My faith is rushing toward wholeness. I am blessed and fortunate and very aware of both. I am ready for 34.

Here’s to a year prosperous in love, faith, and success in all it’s truest forms – for all of us.

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One thought on “Ready For 34

  1. cherylamkopcak

    Amazing as always! To others who take the time to read posted comments, know that this amazingly strong and resilient lady’s mother is VERY PROUD of her! To the writer, my second child and eldest daughter…Happy Birthday! You are loved!

    Reply

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